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Way Off the Road

Discovering the Peculiar Charms of Small Town America

ebook
1 of 1 copy available
1 of 1 copy available
Celebrated roving correspondent for CBS News Sunday Morning and bestselling author Bill Geist serves up a rollicking look at some small-town Americans and their offbeat ways of life.
“In rural Kansas, I asked our motel desk clerk for the name of the best restaurant in the area. After mulling it over, he answered: ‘I'd have to say the Texaco, 'cuz the Shell don't have no microwave.’”
Throughout his career, Bill Geist’s most popular stories have been about slightly odd but loveable individuals. Coming on the heels of his 5,600-mile RV trip across our fair land is Way Off the Road, a hilarious and compelling mix of stories about the folks featured in Geist’s segments, along with observations on his twenty years of life on the road. Written in the deadpan style that has endeared him to millions, Geist shares tales of eccentric individuals, such as the ninety-three-year-old pilot-paperboy who delivers to his far-flung subscribers by plane; the Arizona mailman who delivers mail via horseback down the walls of the Grand Canyon; the Muleshoe, Texas, anchorwoman who delivers the news from her bedroom (occasionally wearing her bathrobe); and the struggling Colorado entrepreneur who finds success employing a sewer vacuum to rid Western ranchers of problematic prairie dogs. Geist also takes us to events such as the Mike the Headless Chicken Festival (celebrating an inspiring bird that survived decapitation, hired an agent, and went on the road for eighteen months) and Sundown Days in Hanlontown, Iowa, where the town marks the one day a year when the sun sets directly between the railroad tracks
Along the wacky and wonderful way, Geist shows us firsthand how life in fly-over America can be odd, strangely fascinating, hysterical, and anything but boring.
“To say it very simply, freezer burn may very well have set in.” —neighbor on the frozen dead guy kept on ice in a backyard shed in Nederland, Colorado.   
 “Everybody loves a parade; we were just geographically challenged.” —David Harrenstein, organizer of a parade in tiny Whalan, Minnesota, where viewers are in motion and the “marchers” stand still.
“We haven’t lost anyone off these switchbacks in at least ten days” —Mailman Charlie Chamberlain, leading us on horseback 2,500 feet down the sheer walls of the Grand Canyon.
 
“Ours are the finest cow chips in the world today,” —Kirk Fisher, enthusiast, in Beaver, Oklahoma, world cow-chip capital and cow- chip exporter.
“We live out in the middle of the corn and bean fields, and there’s not a whole lot to get excited about, you know?” —Dan Moretz, on celebrating the day the sun sets in the middle of the railroad tracks in Hanlontown, Iowa.
“It’s like drilling for oil; sometimes you come up dry.” —Gay Balfour, who sucks problematic prairie dogs out of the ground with a sewer vacuum in Cortez, Colorado.    
“All you have to do is beat the flies to it,” —Michael “Roadkill” Coffman on the secrets of cooking with roadkill outside Lawrence, Kansas.  
 
“I ain’t gonna brake ´til I see God!” —driver named “Red Dog,” taking the track at a figure-eight school bus race in Bithlo, Florida.
“It’s a gift; you either got it or you don’t.” —Lee Wheelis, world watermelon-seed-spitting champion, Luling, Texas.
“I am the mayor, the board, the secretary-treasurer, the librarian, the bartender...
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    • Publisher's Weekly

      April 30, 2007
      CBS roving correspondent and author Geist offers up an amusing and expansive collection of America's quirky, strange and offbeat nooks. The "Land of Lost Luggage" in Scottsboro, Ala., for instance, is where the millions of bags airlines "lose" every year wind up and "every day is like Christmas" for the locals. In New Glarus, Wis., photographer Kathy DeBruin has a reputation as the "Annie Leibovitz of cow portraiture." And then there's Boston's Museum of Dirt, where, among other amazing dirt is a display of dirt taken from Barry Manilow's driveway. While mirth is in plentiful supply, some of Geist's stories are real nail biters, such as his trip via mule train to deliver mail to the Havasupai Native American tribe. (Its members live on the floor of the Grand Canyon.) Geist's low key, deadpan humor hits the mark, and he has a gentle way of writing just to the point of ridicule before he backs off. Readers will find nearly 30 tales that will amaze and amuse and maybe inspire some extra stops on their next road trip.

    • Library Journal

      May 1, 2007
      Why does the Midwest seem to have more colorful characters than the rest of the country? Emmy Award-winning correspondent and commentator Geist ("Little League Confidential") profiles the unique characters, animals, and pastimes of small-town America. Some of the stories will be familiar to fans of his segments on "CBS News Sunday Morning", but others are new and definitely of the laugh-out-loud variety. Join Geist as he interviews an entrepreneur who has a successful business vacuuming prairie dogs out of the ground with a used sewer-cleaning truck; discover what happens at a festival dedicated to a headless chicken; and tag along as he searches for new dining pleasures: "In rural Kansas, I asked our motel desk clerk for the name of the best restaurant in the area. After mulling it over, he answered: 'I'd have to say the Texaco, 'cuz the Shell don't have no microwave.'" Geist genuinely delights in his finds, and readers will, too. Recommended for all public libraries. [See Prepub Alert, "LJ" 2/15/07.]Susan Belsky, Oshkosh P.L., WI

      Copyright 2007 Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

    • Booklist

      June 1, 2007
      This year marks Geists twentieth anniversary as an on-air correspondent for the CBS News program Sunday Morning, and by way of celebration, he marks the occasion with this witty, good-natured exploration of small-town America. When Geist says small town, he means small: one of the places he visists, Hanlontown, Iowa, has a population of 229. Yet the place is lively enough to have its annual Sundown Days, which celebrate the fact that, on the summer solstice, the sun sets on the railroad tracks. Then theres Loyalton, California (population 817), whose paperboy, age 92, delivers the paper from an airplane, sort of dive-bombing his subscribers. (Hes a younger cousin of the Wright brothers.) Not all of the places Geist visits are quite so smallChattanooga, Tennessee, has 154,762 residentsbut they are all just as interesting (Chattanooga is home to the International Towing and Recovery Hall of Fame Museum). Geist, as usual, writes in a friendly, slightly off-kilter tone, pointing out these unusual places with their unusual people but never quite making fun of them.(Reprinted with permission of Booklist, copyright 2007, American Library Association.)

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